Controlling Destiny

I've stopped trying to induce labour (or at least attempt all the things the Internet says induces labour). I found that by trying to control something that I have no control over only makes me feel guilty (and useless) when it fails. So I have come to terms with the fact that this child will come when it's good and ready. And it just might possibly be late. Oh, and I'm no longer listening to anyone (including the doctor) when they tell me that it shouldn't be too much longer now. The doctor told me within the week. He has two days for this to happen. Truth is, you don't know. He doesn't know. I don't know. Every night I go to bed and wonder what will happen if I go into labour in the middle of the night. And every morning I wake up still pregnant. And the sad thing is, I haven't even reached my due date. I should not be feeling like this. So I've decided to stop. Sooner or later, I will have my baby. If it does go late, like Abby, I will still have my baby. If it happens in the next 2 hours, I will still have my baby. (But then at least I don't have to make supper!) And if it happens to complicate a few parent teacher interviews, then too bad. That's right, I'm pulling the selfish pregnant lady card. You can reschedule your kid's interview.

So now there's not too much to do around the house. Mark has the rest of the weekend before he's back at school. I think he'll be happy to get back. He's been kinda bored around here. Nothing to do except stare at my stationary tummy. At least at work he'll have some distractions.

It's supposed to be a nice day tomorrow - rain has stopped and the crazy wind has settled down finally. Hopefully we can get outside and enjoy the fresh air. I've been cooped up in here for too long.