Shows What I Know
I thought it was going to warm up. Ha. This morning it was -35 outside! Yikes. I braved the cold anyway to get some groceries and then off to the Mom's Bible Study. It was a small group and I liked it, more intimate that way. Abby was the only child there.
I was invited to go to a La Leche League meeting tomorrow. The group does more than just breastfeeding, there's a lot of child care tips and parenting info. It sounds really good and I almost caved but I think that I can't go. It's just that I have finally gotten the strength to believe in what I am doing is right and I'm scared if I go, I'm going to be bombarded by different styles that I'll get overwhelmed and start to doubt myself. The last thing I need to do is start second guessing myself. I can admit that I don't know everything and I am open to new ideas. My problem is that I know their style and I am just not that comfortable with it and I'll start to doubt myself and send me spiralling back. I want to wean Abby when she hits 6 months and I know what they're going to say, "Just stick with it." I want her to be on the bottle when I go back to work (But you can pump at work). I don't want to, and actually, I don't think I could pump at work. I don't care if you want to breastfeed your child until they are 4 years old, actually that's admirable, but I don't. I'm just not strong enough to stand up to an entire group. I'm torn because I wouldn't mind going to a group like that and I do believe that breastfeeding is best, it's just they are almost too strong. I think they do a great service but the last thing I need to to doubt myself. I am feeling so comfortable about what my baby needs and how to provide that for her. I feel that I've come so far from where I was and I can't go back to that nervous, second-guessing, timid wannabe mother. Besides, I have lots to do and I'm not looking forward to bundling up Abby again and trudging through the cold.
I was invited to go to a La Leche League meeting tomorrow. The group does more than just breastfeeding, there's a lot of child care tips and parenting info. It sounds really good and I almost caved but I think that I can't go. It's just that I have finally gotten the strength to believe in what I am doing is right and I'm scared if I go, I'm going to be bombarded by different styles that I'll get overwhelmed and start to doubt myself. The last thing I need to do is start second guessing myself. I can admit that I don't know everything and I am open to new ideas. My problem is that I know their style and I am just not that comfortable with it and I'll start to doubt myself and send me spiralling back. I want to wean Abby when she hits 6 months and I know what they're going to say, "Just stick with it." I want her to be on the bottle when I go back to work (But you can pump at work). I don't want to, and actually, I don't think I could pump at work. I don't care if you want to breastfeed your child until they are 4 years old, actually that's admirable, but I don't. I'm just not strong enough to stand up to an entire group. I'm torn because I wouldn't mind going to a group like that and I do believe that breastfeeding is best, it's just they are almost too strong. I think they do a great service but the last thing I need to to doubt myself. I am feeling so comfortable about what my baby needs and how to provide that for her. I feel that I've come so far from where I was and I can't go back to that nervous, second-guessing, timid wannabe mother. Besides, I have lots to do and I'm not looking forward to bundling up Abby again and trudging through the cold.
My Happy Baby
Sometimes after I change Abby's diaper, I set her down on the super soft Sherpa's Blanket. She wiggles around and giggles and has lots of fun. Here's some pictures...
Comments
What am I trying to say? Well. Just that. You're damned right. ;)